Robin's First Awards Show
by Ash9
Summary: The hottest young actress in Hollywood has picked Dick to be her date for one of the biggest award shows of the year. The good news: she's beautiful, talented and a fan of Dick's. The bad news: this show will have the highest ratings ever and for all the wrong reasons when two notorious criminals drop in uninvited. But this is live television and the cameras will keep rolling...
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: So, nope, I don't own the characters in this story. They are immortal, transcendent and totally awesome as well as not being mine. All hail the Young Justice writers and creators who incarnated this particular Robin. Well done, my friends.

 _AN: Um...this is my first Young Justice story. I hope that you guys don't mind me playing in your sandbox! The fact is that I am a long-time Dick Grayson fan but missed seeing Young Justice until it appeared on Netflix. I watched it and loved it and began haunting Black Friar's fanfic page as well as other YJ writers to get more of these characters. I studied and read and wondered and supposed. Plot bunnies were born but for some reason, it took years for them to grow up and be REAL story bunnies. At last, here we are! I really hope you enjoy it._

* * *

"Mr. Roberts, what has your attention so fixed on the window outside?" The Japanese teacher, Mr. Hamasaki, barked out his question from the front of the classroom.

Dick, who, unlike his fellow students, had been following the lecture on Japanese culture with keen interest, swiveled his head to look at Devon Roberts. Devon was turning red as the entire class focused on him, an unfortunate side effect of being an Irish redhead.

"S-s-sorry Mr.-Mr. Hamasaki, but there's a stretch Hummer that just pulled up outside. It's got, like gold-plated _everything!"_ A whisper of excitement went through the class. "It's got to be somebody famous, right?"

"A logical assumption, but one that will not help you on tomorrow's test. Perhaps you can help us conjugate the next verb on the list, Mr. Roberts. _Bōdo ni shite kudasai made arukimasu._ "

Devon pushed himself out of his desk, unwillingly, and walked up to the board, still blushing. A few students giggled, but most were trying to catch glimpses out the window without being caught. Dick was only one row away, since Bruce insisted he sit close to the windows, just in case. He'd foiled at least one kidnapping attempt by going out the window and shinnying down one of the drainpipes. On days when school bored him, he often wished he could do it again.

But not today. Dick took a quick glance outside and saw that the stretch Hummer was indeed tricked out, just like Devon had said. Dick frowned. Gotham Academy was a premier college prep school. It wasn't that a limo pulling up to the school was such a startling sight, but that _particular_ one and in the middle of the day...

Ostentation was frowned upon by the Gotham elite, and no family that Dick knew would drive something like _that_ to school. Maybe it was a relative of one of the students. Dick's mind buzzed over the possibilities like one of Bruce's training questions, considering each student in the school in alphabetical order and listing their known relatives. It wasn't hard to listen to the lecture as well. Good practice at multi-tasking.

He remained happily engaged in the mystery until an announcement over the intercom turned this personal.

"Mr. Hamasaki, could you please send Richard Grayson to the office as soon as possible."

Mr. Hamasaki frowned in Dick's direction. "Go now."

"Yes, sir," Dick jumped out of his seat and headed for the door, head down, mind spinning. Whispers around the room grew until finally Dick caught a name.

"I saw her," a girl near the back of the room hissed, her voice rising hysterically. "It's Lisi Ericksson!"

Dick froze, then pushed through the door, his mind stuck in one place. _Lisi Ericksson?_ Quickly, he cycled through everything he knew about the girl: movie actress, star of the current fad trilogy called _Synapses_. She was of Swedish descent, born in Ohio, but had moved to L.A. to pursue acting. And...now he was wondering why so much info about her had stuck in his mind. How did he even know all of that? It's not like he was a huge fan. But then again, Wally had drooled over her movies in the past and especially that bikini scene in a silly beach musical.

In fact, if she was here, Wally was going to kill him for not letting him know. _But here?_ Why Gotham Academy, and why would Dick be called to the office to deal with it? Any reason he came up with was immediately dismissed as being ludicrous.

 _Better not try to figure this one out,_ he reasoned. He wasn't much of a celebrity hound, being the recipient of far too much of celebrity focus and hounding himself. He tended to try to respect people's privacy...well, unless they were a criminal of some kind. And then he tended to hack them and troll them mercilessly.

Dick smirked at the memory of the last corrupt banker he'd trolled, charging 400 pizzas to his business account and sending them to a homeless food bank one cold winter evening. If only Dick could have been there to see them scarf the pizzas.

But as he arrived at the front atrium of the school building, he slowed. Principal Stephens was there, along with several secretaries, several security guards and a large man that had to be a bodyguard. Dick read his body language and found the line of a gun inside his jacket when he moved. _Armed and dangerous, then._ The man was frowning at Dick, completely ignoring Principal Stephens.

The man in charge of Gotham Academy, who regularly dealt with Bruce Wayne as well as other high-profile Gothamites, was looking uncharacteristically nervous. "I'm sure everything will be fine," Principal Stephens said in a light tone, "as long as Mr. Wayne gets back to us very soon."

As soon as he caught sight of Dick, his expression brightened. "Ah, here you are, Richard! There is someone here to see you."

Dick came to a stop in front of the two men, still trying to read the situation. The two security guards he knew seemed to be at ease. But Dick kept his stance light, ready to jump away if the bodyguard proved to be dangerous. "Principal Stephens, who wanted to see me?" he asked.

"A young lady named-"

The bodyguard interrupted, "Lisi Eriksson is outside and wants to have a little chat with you."

Dick's eyebrows rose in disbelief. "Why would _she_ want to talk to _me?"_

The guard crossed his arms. "She'll tell you as soon as you come outside."

The principal gave a light laugh, "Which is the problem. Mr. Wayne has very strict rules regarding Richard's safety and he would never agree-"

One security guard stepped up. "There's three of us, as soon as Murphy gets here. We'll accompany him outside, sir."

Dick gave a little sigh. Overprotective!Bats strikes again. But really, this bodyguard _could_ be dangerous. It would be stupid to go outdoors with an armed guard while Dick couldn't act as Robin. _Dumb, even._ But if Lisi was outside...

"Come out, come out, Dick Grayson!" came a sweet voice from outside, projected by some sort of microphone loud enough to hear through the front doors, in fact, probably loud enough to be heard by the entire school.

The bodyguard uncrossed his arms. "There are cameras outside the gates of the school from _Entertainment Tonight._ Do you really think we're going to do anything beside talk to Dick?"

" _Entertainment Tonight?_ We have strict rules regarding publicity-" the Principal began.

"They're off-property," the guard insisted. "Now, Mr. Grayson, if you'll follow me."

Dick looked at the Principal, considered his options, and followed the guard.

"Richard?" the Principal said shrilly, "if you'll wait until Murphy arrives..."

Dick looked back and made eye contact with man. "Two guards will be enough, right guys?" He gestured to them to accompany him. "It'll be fine. I'll explain it to Bruce." As he turned back, the bodyguard gave him a wry smile, and Dick relaxed. This man was sending off solid, trustworthy vibes.

The two guards took up positions on either side of him and Dick tried not to sigh too loudly.

Outside, there was the tacky, white stretch Hummer with gold accents. Bruce would have said something scathing if he had seen it. But Dick's attention was completely taken by the short, slight girl in front of it, dressed impeccably in an ivory sweater dress and high-heeled ivory boots.

"Hi," she called out, waving to the students peeking out of the school windows. Her eyes lit up when she caught sight of Dick exiting the building and put down the microphone.

"Dick!" She waved to him with a sweet smile.

The cheers of the kids surprised him as he stepped out from under the portico. He looked over his shoulder to see kids hanging out of the windows and yelling down to him, some of them with their phones out, taking video and pictures.

There was going to be ample evidence of this conversation. Bruce was going to kill him. But what else was he supposed to do? Hide in the bathroom?

Lisi gave him a dimpled smile as he approached. "Hi, Dick! Sorry for the uproar, but, well...I'm pretty sure that you would refuse to see me if I didn't make this much of a big deal out of it."

Silently agreeing, Dick stopped a few feet away from her, trying to ignore the whole world watching, wondering if anyone could hear the conversation, figuring they probably could. _Damn._

"Um...why would you want to see me, anyway?"

"Well, you _are_ Dick Grayson, after all. Bruce Wayne is your dad."

"Guardian," he corrected without thought.

"Oh, sorry-guardian. So you've been almost _everywhere_ and done _everything_."

"And you haven't?" Dick deflected, patently aware that she was more right than she realized. She didn't know about his nighttime job _._

"Okay, yes...maybe more than the average girl. And, unlike _some_ celebrities, _I_ don't avoid public appearances."

Dick flushed, embarrassed that someone had noticed how much he'd been out of the limelight over the last year, ever since the Team had begun. He wanted to defend himself, but found no reply that would help. Truth was, he wasn't really comfortable with his celebrity life; he hated having a Dick Grayson fan club, since those people could only be a fan because of his looks or the famed Wayne inheritance. _Whatever._ The Robin fan club made much more sense to him.

"You have a perfect right to your privacy and I totally get why you hate celebrity life. Believe me. I give you full permission to crawl back into your cave after this...but Dick I need your help!" Again, Dick blinked at her choice of words. _If she only knew..._

" _Can_ you help me with something?" she went on, taking a step closer.

"Uh...that depends on what it is." His cell phone rang. He pulled it out automatically and saw Wally's number on it. "Sorry." He Ignored it. "What do you need help with?" Her dark brown eyes were pleading with him. "I need someone to take me somewhere, someone who can handle pressure situations, someone who is gentlemanly and well, being completely, drop-dead gorgeous is a plus."

Dick's eyes opened in shock. "Wha-you mean, _me?"_ His voice didn't exactly squeak, but it didn't sound very manly either. And his cheeks may have gotten a little pink. _Damn._ _Who teaches girls to_ _ **do**_ _this?_ She was totally in control of this conversation, and-

His phone rang again. He pressed Ignore.

"Yes, you," she said with a light giggle. "Do you have any idea how intimidating it is to go to an awards show? How awful it is to be there alone with all those cameras on you? But I _have_ to go. So. I want you to go with me and share the-maybe you should answer that?"

Dick sighed and nodded as his phone rang again, "It must be important. This'll just take a second." He turned slightly away and hissed, "Walls, _what is it?"_

"DUDE! Youarestandingthisclose to _**Lisi!**_ WhatisshedoinginGotham?"

"Wait-how do you know-"

"T.V.! Dudetherearecameracrewsrightoutsidethegatesofyourschoolandyou're

ontelevisionrightnow!"

Dick glanced back past the Hummer and sure enough, there were camera crews filming him right now.

"Kiss her!" several voices from classrooms above called down.

Dick felt his face flushing.

"Dude!" Wally said louder, "I said **why** is she **there?"**

Dick turned away from Lisi again, unable to meet her eyes again. "She wants me to go to this awards show with her, but-"

Wally hollered loudly in Dick's ear. "OHMYGOD! That isthemostawesomethingI'veever heard!"

"But-"

"Wait-you aresaying **yes** , right?"

"I don't think Bruce-"

"Bruce? Don't worry about **him** rightnow. Ifyousaynotoher, I'll never speaktoyouagain! **Ever!"**

"What?"

"If my friendship means anythingtoyou, youhavetosay **yes!"**

"Wally,that's-"

"I mean it! I am speaking for every dude in America rightnow. We are all you and we all want you to say yes! Do it for all of us who never have a chance to even _look_ at her in person, much less hold her _handorkissher!"_

"I'm not kissing her-" Dick whispered.

"Don't make promises you can't keep! Now turn around and say 'yes!'"

Dick groaned and turned off his phone. When he turned back around, Lisi was waving at the students above and the cacophony had risen to the level of a din.

"Sorry about that," he said in a low voice. "I really would like to say yes, but I'm not sure Bruce would feel safe with me at an awards show. There have been...problems in the past."

"Oh, I know and I know that's one reason you aren't out in public as much. It's a good reason! But you've already met Gunther, who is my bodyguard and head of my security. Trust me, he'll convince your dad-I mean, guardian- that you'll be safe."

Dick raised his eyebrows and looked at the man anew. After a moment of speculation, he asked, "Special Forces?"

"Navy SEAL. Honorable discharge eight years ago, after a bullet caught me in the knee. Reconstructive surgery made it almost as good as new. It's the _almost_ that keeps me a bodyguard and not a SEAL. You'll be safe. I'll make sure of it."

Dick hesitated. Something in him responded to the man's earnest statement and to Wally's threat...and maybe something else responded to the plea in Lisi's brown eyes.

" _Please,_ Dick?" Lisi asked, and the answer seemed simple.

"Sure. I'll go."

She shrieked and jumped forward to grab Dick in a hug, which resulted a loud roar of approval from their audience, especially when that hug culminated in a short kiss to Dick's cheek. Dick's arms automatically rose in surprise, but he stopped himself from touching her, not sure of what to do. When she pulled away, his cheeks felt like they were flaming.

Lisi was smiling wide, her eyes sparkling. "I have _so_ many ideas of what we can do!"  
"Uh...aren't we just going to the awards show? Is there more?" he asked nervously. "Oh, and which awards show is it?" Dick suddenly realized that he should have asked for more details. Bruce was going to have his head for this!

"Oh! Silly me, it's the High Five Awards. And yes, we're just attending but I'm giving out an award and I would really, really love it if you walked up there with me. But we'll talk more about it later. It's not until January!" By this point, she was already at her Hummer door, gesturing for her chauffeur to let her inside. "Bye Dick! Thanks again! I'll call you."

Her bodyguard, an amused smile on his lips, gave Dick a nod and then climbed in after her.

As they drove away, causing a flurry of motion at the school's gates, Dick turned around to face the school. Hundreds of students were hanging out of the windows, cheering for him.

Despite himself, he gave them a wave and a smile back. It wasn't the worst thing in the world, getting kissed by a gorgeous girl.

His phone rang again, and he sent Wally off into a torrent of words when he confessed that he'd agreed to accompany Lisi on a date to a televised awards show. The more Wally talked about it, the worse Dick felt. He really hadn't thought this through.

There was probably going to be a very uncomfortable dinner where he had to make small talk with a movie star; there were going to be cameras and screaming fans; there was going to be pressure to kiss a girl who would then be asked about their relationship in every interview she did for a very long time. Dick hung up feeling queasy.

And then, the number one question on his mind: what on earth was Bruce going to say?

* * *

"No. Absolutely not. There is no way to guarantee your safety in a building that large and full of...teenagers. No."

That's what Bruce said, and for some reason, Dick had felt relief at Bruce's words initially. He was off the hook. No cameras, no kiss, no potential for failure that would live on in infamy forever. But.

He hadn't counted on the persistence of Lisi Ericksson, or the brilliance of her bodyguard. Gunther. They double-teamed Bruce, bombarding him with pleas (Lisi) and plans (Gunther) that were so winning and air-tight that Bruce found himself amusedly agreeing that it was an airtight security plan. Of course he would make his own security plan and check out Gunter's staff obsessively. Dick kept expecting for Bruce to call it off when he found the plan faulty. To Dick's surprise, nothing of the sort happened. Which meant that it was up to Dick to come up with a last second foolproof reason to bow out, and that's where Lisi's brown eyes really came into play.

An hour later, Dick became Robin and floated into Mount Justice in a haze. As soon as Wally could get him alone, he peppered Robin with questions about Lisi.

"Yes," Robin finally answered, disbelief still coloring his voice, "Bruce said yes and then what could i do? I was going to say no, I really was! But I said yes."

Wally's subsequent celebration was so loud that Conner was there in a heartbeat and the two had to come up with a quick lie. "New PS4 game coming out. Rob can get me an advance copy."

Conner studied them a moment. "There's no point in lying," he growled as he turned away. "You're too loud to keep secrets from me."

Robin turned to Wally, the whites of his mask wide in panic. "Dude, help me. My first date is going to be on _television_. _**Live**_!"

"No way. This is your first date?" Wally abruptly sat in the desk chair, huffing out a frustrated breath. "Why do you always get the cool stuff? Your first date is with Lisi Eriksson and is nationally televised! How is that even fair?"

"Wally-focus! Live television, dude. LIVE. As in, I can make a fool of myself in front of the entire world and it will be on YouTube forever!"

Wally shrugged it off. "I guess, but I bet all anyone will remember is how adorable you look in a tux."

"Oh, shut up! And I'm not wearing a tux. It's not the Oscars."

"Doesn't matter. All your fans will take pictures and put them up on their walls. ' _He's so cute and adorable and I just want to kiss his -'"_

At that point, Robin tackled him off the chair and slapped a hand over his mouth. Kid Flash half-heartedly fought back, but he was laughing too hard.

"KF, I swear...this is all your fault and if this goes wrong I will kill you!"

At the emergence of Robin's mini-Batglare, the redhead finally stopped laughing and shook his head under Robin's hand. Robin jumped off him.

Wally watched him pace across the room. "It's going to be fine, Rob. Geez. Who cares if the whole world is watching? You'll be on a date with Lisi Eriksson...and it will be awesome. Something you can brag about forever, even though you won't. I swear the good stuff is wasted on you."

Rob frowned. Since when was Wally the one telling _him_ to calm down? For the first time, he wondered why he was so jittery about this. On the outside, it did seem like a win/win situation: beautiful girl, fun night, lots of excitement. Sure, there would be lots of cameras, but It wasn't the promised media attention that was bothering him-not really. There was something else...something he couldn't put his finger on. For some reason, he had a seriously bad feeling about that night.

 _A/N: Just did some editing. Nothing important!_


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

* * *

"Master Dick, you look striking," Alfred said as soon as Dick walked into the kitchen.

Dick gave a crooked grin. He felt comfortable in his dressy but secretly stretchy dark jeans, a light blue button-down and a midnight blue sports jacket. Lisi had told him that they'd be in the limo for hours in line to get dropped off, and sitting around in various places so comfort was important. No bow tie, thank you very much, even Bruce had nearly insisted. But that wasn't what Dick was so excited about. He and Lisi had a little surprise planned for mid-show entertainment.

It had been so long since he'd been able to show some skills as Dick Grayson. _This is going to be awesome_. _Wally is going to freak!_ He and Lisi had never actually performed together the surprise they had planned for their segment of the show, but it was going to be pretty spectacular.

He and Bruce had gone over the tricks, making sure that there wasn't enough Robin in them to do any harm. This was something that they had to do every six months or so, anyway. Truthfully, Dick was always tempted to put a little too much flair in his moves. It was inborn, something that would have been great under the big top, but was out of place fighting alongside Batman. Then Dick needed to incapacitate his foe with strong, hard, fast moves. Not much time for flair. But every now and then, Bruce would catch him stretching out in a flip, arching his back and going more for feel than speed. That was dangerous for Robin. No one should be able to connect Robin with the circus orphan Dick Grayson. If they did, it would all be over for Batman, and Dick would have cost him the thing that made Bruce's life worth living. He was _not_ going to do that.

But as Dick Grayson, he _could_ be an acrobat and show off as much as he wanted. Sure, it made him a weirdo; being an ultra flexible aerialist and a good tumbler wasn't actually cool to...well, anyone except those strange kids in his fan club. And, apparently, Lisi. She thought it was great and she wanted him to use it tonight. He couldn't deny that the thought of performing in front of a thousand-kid audience was pretty exciting.

They were going to love Lisi's act as well. She'd been taking lessons from a professional aerialist for her most recent movie role and that was why she naturally thought of Dick when she wanted a partner.

Dick shucked his jacket. He was full of nervous energy. Just for fun, he did a round-off back handspring into a backflip that landed him faultlessly on top the banister, a two-footed landing. He lightly walked up the banister to the second floor, focusing on his footwork and enjoying the respite from worrying about tonight. He flipped forward into a handstand and walked from one banister to the curve of the next. Physical exertion always calmed him when he was upset, helping him focus on the here and now instead of the then and long ago or the future or whatever else it was that had him worked up.

Dick flipped back onto his feet and turned back, halting midway between the posts. Then he set his sights on the chandelier. It would still hold his weight; he hadn't grown that much since his last attempt. With a smirk, he darted forward along the banister and punched off the end into a front flip that catapulted him into the middle of all that beautiful crystal. He whooped as he caught hold of the bars in the center.

"I hope you've planned a better dismount than last time," Alfred remarked dryly from below.

"Oh, right," Dick said, suddenly remembering the sprained ankle he'd gotten last time. "Um..."

"Shall I retrieve the trampoline from the kitchen?"

"Uh...yeah, thanks." Dick climbed astride the bar in the center of the chandelier and looked around the house with interest. It was a bit dusty up here, and the lights were warmer than he remembered. Maybe he shouldn't have done this now...

"Ready when you are, Master Dick," Alfred remarked as readied the mini-tramp below Dick.

"Thanks Alfred. This is gonna be awesome. Hey! Would you video it?"

Alfred pulled Dick's phone from the pocket of his jacket, well-used to this request. It was one of Dick's fondest wishes to start his own YouTube channel filled with his crazy stunts. But he couldn't do that without revealing who he really was, so oh well. He'd have to content himself with watching videos that people had caught of Robin in action. Those were pretty cool, too.

"Recording has begun."

With a deep breath and a whoop of joy, Dick slid off his perch and into a double somersault as he fell. His stomach dropped but he loved it all the same as he landed on the tramp and sprung back into the air, flipping forward three times before landing in a crouch on the carpet.

'Yes!" he shouted, just as the doorbell rang. He turned to Alfred blankly, who was still recording. "Oh. Is it time?"

"Indeed sir." Alfred handed Dick his phone and walked calmly for the door. "I suggest you straighten up."

"Oh right! I need to get sheveled." His brain seemed to be moving three steps behind normal, but he tugged on his jacket and strode to the mirror in the hallway. His face was flushed and his eyes bright with excitement. And the purple shirt did sort of bring out the blue in his eyes, like Wally had said, even though he'd been teasing. But it looked good, and with his hair combed back and a normal smile on his face, he looked nothing like the daredevil Robin.

"Yes," Alfred said approvingly, "you look far less disheveled now."

Bruce appeared at the entry. "I guess I nearly missed you. Is that Lisi at the door?"

"Yep. So what do you think?" He spread out his arms and turned, with a Robin smirk.

"I think you'll do," Bruce said with an amused smile. "Remember if you get a kiss, make sure everyone can see it. Don't want to let the name of Wayne down."

Dick's eyebrows shot up. "You _want_ me to kiss her? On television?"

"Well...not if you aren't ready. Just...uh, go at your own pace, Dick." Bruce hesitated before walking over and putting a hand on his shoulder. He bent down to peer into Dick's eyes. "Forget I said anything. Just have a good time and...be yourself. You've earned a night out with no expectations from me."

Dick felt relieved at Bruce's final words. "Okay. I guess I'd better go." He impulsively threw his arms around Bruce's waist. "Thanks for letting me do this."

Bruce said nothing in return, but his arms tightened around Dick before he released him. "Go, before I regret it." As Dick turned away, Bruce called after him, "You have your incognito belt? Is your personal alarm armed?"

"Yes and yes, but I'm turning it off once we get there. There will be too many people close by. It'll be going off non-stop."

"Alright. But turn it back on before you leave."

"You got it. Good night, Bruce! Or will you be there incognito?"

"Have fun. I'll be watching," Bruce replied without clarifying.

"I know! Bye!"

Dick ran all the way to the front door, where Alfred was standing ready. His heart was pounding and he wished he had drunk some water; his mouth was dry as a tombstone. Alfred raised an eyebrow at his approach.

"I know, I know." Dick tried to calm his breathing. "I'm combobulated." Alfred paused one long moment and Dick felt he had to explain. "You know, the opposite of discombobulated."

Alfred rolled his eyes heavenward which totally cracked Dick up. "Good, sir," he replied, and then opened the door to a truly stunning sight.

Lisi was there, and was a vision of beauty in a white, grecian style short dress that complimented her figure perfectly. Her skin was peachy and flawless, her face lovely with soft, muted make-up that kept her looking bright-eyed and...well, perfect. Yeah, that was it. She looked like...perfection.

"Wow," Dick said, trying to put into words what he felt, "you look so...amazing." He flushed as he said the words, embarrassed.

But she beamed at the compliment and the dimple in her chin deepened accordingly. "And you look scorching! I love the color of that jacket. Ready to ride?"

"Yeah."

Dick followed her out to the car and nodded to Gunther as he opened the door for him. They settled inside and Dick listened intently as Lisi talked about her expectations of the evening, her worst awards show experiences and the people he would be seeing there tonight. She was only fourteen-and-a-half; Dick had looked it up. But with her wealth of experience in the world of Hollywood, she seemed so much older.

Dick grew more and more comfortable as time went on. He decided that he liked Lisi enough to become friends and that Bruce's expectation of a kiss would have to wait a few years. How on earth could he ever be that bold? She was way too perfect to attack with a kiss just to say he'd done it. There was something very distasteful about that.

After a half an hour drive, they were in line at Gotham's Wayne Memorial Theater. Dick tried to ignore the name of the building, but Lisi smiled when she saw it. "What is it like being the ward of a famous man like that, and seeing his name everywhere?"

Dick thought a moment before answering, surprised that he wanted to give her a good answer. Reporters always asked him that and he hated it. "It's kind of horrible, really. I'm not famous like you, because I did something amazing or anything-just because of who took me in."

"Well, I feel the same way! Really," Lisi insisted, "I'm just an actress. I play this great character who is so brave and can fight and lead other people, but in real life...I'm just me. I'm nothing like her."

Dick raised his eyebrows, impressed by her honesty. He thought he knew the character she meant, the one Wally loved, who lead a revolution because of her courage. "Come on. You must be a little like her, or you couldn't play her so convincingly. Who knows? Maybe you'd be just as heroic if you were in her place."

"I don't think so," she said seriously. "I don't know how you do it. There's always someone coming after you, threatening your life just because of who you are and you don't let it stop you."

Dick sighed quietly. "I let it stop me plenty. There's a ton of stuff I don't do because of the danger." This was an honest statement because Bruce was forever holding him back, keeping him "safe" as both Dick and Robin, something that constantly chafed.

"Yeah, but I've _seen_ you. That time when those awful men showed up at your school trying to kidnap you. You were so brave, Dick. I'd totally fall apart, but you were just totally badass."

Dick blinked a few times, readjusting his thinking about Lisi. She'd watched news coverage about him being kidnapped as Dick Grayson, probably the leaked videos as well. Which meant she'd probably seen him goad the gunmen into keeping only him as hostage and letting the other kids go.

From what he remembered, he hadn't been badass, just ward-of-Bruce-Wayne-cocky. That always ticked the bad guys off enough to make mistakes. Usually, that was just what Dick wanted, only this time, the men had been seriously unstable and Dick hadn't been wearing his kevlar because it was just after P.E. class and he'd been so sweaty. By the end of it, he'd had a bloody nose, a sprained left shoulder and a bullet crease on his left thigh. It had seemed to go on forever and he'd been a little worried that Batman wasn't going to get there in time. But he had and Dick had been fine.

They were both shocked when the school video system was hacked that same night before Bruce had been able to shut it down. As a result, almost all of Dick's time as a hostage had been aired on various websites.

Sure, Bruce had pulled them down quickly, but the videos were still out there on hard drives they couldn't reach and they popped up every now and then on YouTube and other sites.

Apparently...Lisi had watched them, and still liked him? A flush crept across his cheeks.

"No, really," Lisi continued, "I keep wondering, how were you so brave? What was going through your head?"

 _Batman's training,_ Dick thought, but he answered, "I don't know. I was kinda mad that guys keep doing that, using me as leverage against Bruce. I guess that kept me from being, you know, scared," he mumbled.

"Well, I'm sorry. Really, I don't know why I even brought that up! I sound like such a fangirl. But really you are brave, and a sweetheart, Dick, and I'm so glad you came with me." She scooted closer in the seat and leaned her head on his shoulder.

 _Wow._ That felt really nice, and she smelled fantastic. And she had just complimented him. This night could only go down from here, but that thought didn't even phase Dick. The next hour, as they inched their way forward in the line and sipped cokes, snacking while they watching coverage of the red-carpet interviews, was actually pretty great. No fancy uncomfortable dinner to sit through, which was fine with Dick.

Then they were cleaning up, brushing off and getting ready. The car stopped once to pick up the lady who was Lisi's make-up artist. She insisted on giving Dick a light layer of make-up before the cameras hit him. _Ugh._ It wasn't too bad; he'd worn makeup plenty of times to cover bad bruises that couldn't be explained away. But she kept going on and on about Dick's skin and how long his eyelashes were ( _what?)_ and how his eyes were her favorite shade of blue. And Lisi was no help, giggling and agreeing until he turned bright red (which they thought was cute, too) until he wanted to throw himself out the car door.

Finally, they were ready and then at the next stop, the make-up artist got out and Lisi's agent climbed in and they talked over what answers to give the reporters. Dick already knew all about how to dodge questions and how to deal with screaming fans, so he mostly tuned them out. He wasn't the headliner when he and Bruce were out on the town, and he figured it would be the same thing here. Most of the fuss would be over Lisi, not him.

Then they were there, and he stepped out first, to the usual cacophony of screams and hubbub that only intensified when he reached back in the limo and helped Lisi step out. Her eyes were sparkling and a beautiful flush had livened her expression. The pandemonium was nearly deafening, coming from all sides. Dick had a difficult time hearing Lisi's directions, but Gunther, who had left someone else to park the limo, seemed to know the way well.

It was like navigating through a funhouse, while stopping again and again to talk nonsense about movies and gossip. Bruce didn't usually want him to talk much to reporters, but these were mostly kid reporters asking questions he liked: what was his favorite PS4 game? why wasn't _he_ in movies? what was his favorite sports team? He could answer those questions. The only ones he didn't like were the ones about Lisi, and he just let her handle those.

She was working the crowd like a pro, teasing them about her relationship with Dick and his role in the show later. He just stood there and tried to look intelligent, knowing Bruce and Wally were both watching. Wally had already sent him a few annoying texts so Dick was ignoring his phone for now.

Everything was going really well until Lisi saw Brad Pitt. He was there with two of his kids, walking the red carpet and as soon as Lisi saw him, she was gone. As in _not there anymore,_ leaving Dick standing there, open-mouthed, with a reporter named Mitzy shoving a mike in his face.

"Looks like you have some stiff competition for Lisi's attention," the girl said annoyingly, "will that mean no kisses tonight?"

Dick managed to close his mouth and stutter something about not kissing her anyway, but the girl was already on to another question.

"Well, no offense but any guy is bound to lose out to Brad Pitt." Dick cast his eyes over to see Lisi bouncing on her toes as she got Brad's autograph. "I had another question for you, anyway: so your Dad is a big supporter of Gotham University, which practically guarantees your acceptance there as well as scholarships to defer costs. What is your feeling on the whole college question? Is college a big waste of money? Is the competition to get into colleges healthy or hurtful and are kids better off trying other ways to prepare for the future?"

Dick studied the girl as she asked question after question, saw the disdain in her eyes for his cushy position in life, having everything handed to him the way he had. She wanted to humiliate him, ask something he wasn't prepared for, but she had no idea who she was messing with.

"That's a complicated question, Mitzy, and something every person has to answer for himself or herself." That non-answer had her smirking, but he wasn't done yet. "I've actually given quite a bit of thought to this myself. I've watched the older students at Gotham Academy wade through the miasma of testing and college applications. It's become so complicated that only the truly motivated can get into college. But maybe that's not a bad thing.

"College used to be the track that everyone took, even when it wasn't necessary. But the fact is that many jobs don't need degrees behind the names of their applicants. Businesses want to hire people who have held down jobs successfully, and often will choose someone willing to work their way up in their chosen field over a degreed candidate. Hundreds of years ago, apprenticeships were far more common. If kids take that route today they can start learning right out of high school, getting wages as well as keeping them from going into the debt that so many college graduates are racking up every year. I think high school juniors should look seriously into internships before their senior year so that they can find where they would like to work in the future. Any experience like that will help inform their decision."

Grudging respect had taken root in the girl's eyes and Dick relaxed again.

"I respect that opinion. Thanks, Dick."

Lisi suddenly appeared back at his side and Dick took her hand, leading her straight past the last few reporters. "Sorry, but I'm done," he explained.

"I know. Sorry! That girl is such a troll! She's always trying to make me look like an idiot. You did great!" She grinned at him.

After that whirlwind, they were separated for a brief time, given a moment to freshen up in the bathrooms. Then they met up at the entrance to the giant theater that housed the awards show.

The ceiling rose hundreds of feet overhead with golden carvings separating the different sections and red plush fabric covering everywhere else. Dick remembered the talk about acoustics and why that fabric helped, but not exactly how. It gave the theater an old-fashioned air and the carvings of animals and mermaids had always reminded Dick of pirate ships.

It was, however, designed to be modular, and the seating directly in front of the orchestra had been pulled out to make room for wide, oval tables with chairs surrounding them. These seats were designated for all the stars in attendance, mostly teenaged music, television or movie stars or stars who had kids who were teenagers.

Dick and Lisi were among the last to take their seats, and there was an audible stir from the kids in the audience to the sides and back of them as they made their way to their table.

It was odd sitting with Lisi and the cast of her latest movie, one that was to be released in a month or two. The groups was so tightly knit while he was only vaguely aware of their names. But they didn't ignore him, and the conversation rolled around him like a gentle tide as he let his gaze rove around the building, automatically noting the location of the exits and the presence of the guards at every door, as had been promised. The security was supposed to be incredibly tight tonight and from what Dick could see, it was all going according to plan.

His mind went to the trick he and Lisi would perform later in the evening. He was really excited about it, even though they had never performed it together. He had the distinct impression that she had no idea how difficult this trick was to perform or she would never have asked it of him. A trick like this, his parents would have had him practice over and over until he got it right and then continued on until he could no longer get it wrong, until it was automatic.

But things worked differently for him as Robin, and constant improvisation had made him more of a clutch performer. He could do this easily, and was glad to go back to something purely athletic and purely performing.

Across the room, he saw several movie stars and got a little star struck himself. How odd to see that they were just regular people, sitting down at a table and chatting, just as he was. But then probably, people thought the same thing about Robin-that he couldn't just be a regular person, too.

That was what made this awards show fun, seeing actors and musicians when they weren't performing. Things never went exactly as you expected them. A popular prank the show pulled was puffs of bright powder attacking stars if they said a word that had to be bleeped and slime getting dumped on anyone that seemed to need it. Definitely more fun than the Oscars.

There was also an audience here, an enormous crowd of excited teens that sat in the rows above the bottom floor where Dick was sitting. A constant wash of voices came down from there, impossible to hear one above the others. And yet, somehow it was possible to sense that Lisi was getting most of the attention.

In the middle of Dick's musings, a teenaged Goth with a pierced nose came over and greeted Lisi, giving her a hug and Dick a glare before once again taking his seat. It took Dick a moment before he realized that he'd just been glared at by the star of her last movie. The guy looked totally different in real life.

Unexpectedly, a cameraman rolled his camera up to their table, broadcasting their faces on the giant screens that had been fixed around the theater at regular intervals. Lisi waved and there was a roar as her fans responded.

"Come on, Dick," she admonished him, "they're excited to see you, too."

Dick reluctantly raised a hand as the camera tilted his way and he was rewarded with another roar of approval. It was seriously loud in here. Then the band started up and everyone's attention went to the stage. Dick breathed a sigh of relief. He was glad they had gotten to their seats so late.

The show began with a comic who poked fun at all the celebrities, making sure to point out Dick and Lisi as a "power couple" in the room. "So would their ship name be Disi or Lisick?"

After that, it took five minutes for Dick's blush to fade, and he spent much of that time staring down at his shoes, being laughed at. Then the countdown to live television began, and the host of the awards was greeting the audience.

It was a guy who used to be in a band, the Hellions, before going on to do a solo act even bigger than the group had been. He was in his twenties and was pretty funny. But really, did he have to make the ship name joke, too? Wally was _so_ going to be all over that.

Then came a parade of stars, each introducing an award and giving it away. There was plenty of slime dumped and plenty of great music.

Lisi, of course, was up for Best Performance by an Actress in her previous movie, but she lost out to a girl in a musical role. Dick leaned over to say, "There's no way she was better than you."

"Thanks, but I'm happy to stay down here and not have to give a speech. So we're up in about half an hour. Are you ready?"

"Oh yeah," he said, giving her his best smirk, "born ready."

Dick was, of course, lying. Time seemed to limp by as his nerves assailed him and he was feeling sick by the time he got up from his table. Backstage, there was a rush of action as he changed into his black athletic tights, tank and gloves, grabbed some water and checked over the equipment. Lisi wrinkled her nose at him, but really, was she going to expect him to trust his life to something when he'd never even seen it before?

 _Graysons leave nothing to chance_ was a phrase ingrained in him from birth. His parents had checked the rigging and the ropes before every performance even when it irked the men setting up. That was one of the things that had made their death so ironic, but Dick wasn't going to think about that right now. _Nope._

"Really, Dick," Lisi complained when he began climbing up the backstage stairs to check the fastenings to the trapeze, "Gunther's already checked everything. He promised your dad, mentor, whatever, that he would."

"Yeah, and so did I," Dick called down in loud whisper, but he still got shushed from the stage manager. It wasn't like he had choice; Bruce also had an obsession about preparation and checking equipment. And this gave him an excellent look at the fly space over the stage and the catwalks that were in place to help the stagehands run the show. He stayed in the backstage area, though; no need to risk distracting someone at an important moment while the show was live.

Minutes later, after getting his make-up checked and downing some water, he got settled into position and stretched out. Whether it was nerves or what, he felt tight all over, which was the opposite of what he needed right now. It took several minutes of stretching and meditation before he felt grounded enough to get into position.

Then all that was left to do was check his awesome gloves. Most aerialists used leather grips, if anything, that had holes for their fingers and only covered their palm and wrist. Dick was different. Maybe it was all of his years of being Robin, but he felt much more comfortable with full leather gloves on. For this occasion, he'd had some specially made in black leather with a large blue stripe running down the center and encompassing his middle and ring fingers. And he hadn't stopped there. He'd also gotten a stripe of blue down the side of his leggings and down the shoulders of his tunic. It didn't really mean anything, but it felt right and matched the blue in Lisi's costume.

As the music started playing, Dick quickly refastened the final velcro strap around his wrist and felt ready. The sick was feeling was gone. This wasn't exactly a circus, but it was close enough. His body thrummed with anticipation and he knew it was all going to go perfectly.

* * *

 _A/N: Bunch of necessary set-up there. Up next: the action begins! Please review, kind souls!_


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

Wally was vibrating so much that Conner threatened to sit on him if he didn't stop. Since none of the rest of the team knew that Dick Grayson was Robin, there was no way Wally could explain his excitement. But come one, how was he supposed to calm down when his best friend was on a _date_ with _Lisi Ericksson?!_ It was impossible.

Dick had been ignoring his texts all day, so Wally had been glued to the television ever since the coverage began with the red carpet arrivals.

To tell the truth, Dick had looked seriously uncomfortable on the red carpet, more fish-out-of-water than lucky-bastard-on-a-dream-date-with-Lisi. But still, there he was, living the life of the rich and famous, breathing the same air as all the movie stars, once again showing Wally how much he was missing.

Sure, Dick got the fame and the money, but wasn't he too pipsqueakish and big-eared to get the girls, too?

Then the actual show began and Wally loved it when the host of the show pointed out a blushing Dick and Lisi out and gave them a couple name: Lisick, which was only a step away from "lipstick" and Wally was going to ride that so hard as soon as he saw Dick.

During the show, the camera often went back to them because Lisi's expression of delight was so beautiful and because her laugh was contagious. They mostly caught Dick just looking interested and polite, the mask he often wore in public. Wally didn't think he was enjoying himself too much.

"Why are you doing that?" Conner broke into Wally's thoughts.

"Huh?"

Conner looked frustrated. "Whenever that girl comes on screen, you stop eating and stare at the screen with this weird look on your face. Why?" Occasionally, Conner's quiet study of human nature focused on Wally, always making him uncomfortable. Right now, since they were only people here, there was no way to escape it.

"Because she's pretty. And it's hard to think straight when I see her."

"But when Artemis is around you still eat."

Wally stared at him.

"You think she is pretty, too," Conner pointed out.

Wally flopped back dramatically on the couch, sending popcorn flying. "I don't have _time_ for this! I guess sometimes I eat because I'm nervous. I don't know!"

Conner nodded. "And Artemis makes you nervous. I see. I'll leave you alone now."

" _Thank_ you!" Wally called after him as the clone left, settling back down to watch the start of the actual awards show.

The camera stayed off of Dick and Lisi for a while and the next time he saw his friend, Wally's jaw dropped.

"She's the reigning queen of teen flicks and he's the ward of Gotham's own billionaire philanthropist. Let's welcome Lisi Ericksson and Dick Grayson!"

There was a crash of music and applause swelled, beginning to taper off as the stage remained bare.

"Um..." The announcer continued, "Lisi? Where are you? I could have sworn she was here just a moment ago..."

Then a spotlight swung high and spotted a trapeze high above the stage.

"There she is!" several fans screamed. Applause swelled.

And then Wally forgot how to breathe, because there was Lisi on a trapeze, like some kind of gorgeous, tiny blue bird from drifting down from heaven...or like a stunningly gorgeous angel, only human and dressed in an awesome blue leotard...or whatever. She looked so hot that Wally's mind was not really processing right.

He knew Dick was around there somewhere, but he had no room in his thoughts for anyone but Lisi.

* * *

The announcer had just helped the audience spot Lisi high above as a single drum began a drumroll. Lisi was now dressed in a glittering leotard and tights of bright blue, standing on the trapeze as if she belonged there. Without acknowledging the audience, she stood and grasped the ropes holding the trapeze. Her feet slipped off the bar behind it and slowly, she relaxed her grip on the ropes to lower herself down. When the bar reached chest high, she lifted her legs, pumping them twice to propel her into a somersault up and around the bar. The crowd went wild.

Dick was amazed to see her so comfortable up there. She'd been holding back on how great she was at the trapeze.

Then music crashed in, and Lisi began working her way around the trapeze, gracefully arching back and wrapping one leg in the rope to keep her balance. There was a light safety harness attached to her, but she wasn't using it at all. All the tricks were her own. Dick wished he could watch more, but it was nearly time for his cue.

An abrupt switch in music came and then the spotlight was on him. Dick planned on making good use of the hidden trampolines placed up and down the stage. He ran, hit the first one and started flipping-front flip, front double, front with a twist and a half, then back handspring, back flip, back handspring, double back flip in a pike position. As soon as he landed, he bounced and flipped front, beginning again, this time ending with a double twisting double back that landed him center stage, underneath Lisi who was still twisting on the trapeze above. His momentum, paired with a few more deep thrusts vaulted him straight up toward the bar holding Lisi.

She was standing now, watching as he soared upward, his momentum ending right as he reached the bar and grabbed on with both hands. The crowd was roaring their approval and Dick felt the need to show off.

"Hold on," he warned Lisi with a grin, then swung his legs up and tucked them under the bar, resting against his torso He was facing up now, folded in half, with all of his weight pulling against his arms. The air around him was alive with expectation and endless possibility. He loved this!

Dick took a deep breath, focusing his mind again. Then in the beat of three seconds, he pumped his legs out slightly, bounced and released the bar. For one second, he was weightless, tethered to nothing but air, and then in the next second, he had twisted completely around and gripped the bar again.

With a rush of adrenaline he listened to the applause and Lisi's gasp. The trick had gone perfectly and once again, he was hanging under the bar. This time, he hauled himself up and set the back of his neck against the bar.

Maybe he shouldn't do this with someone else on the bar?

"Don't move, okay?" he warned Lisi as he looked up at her.

Arching his body like a bow, he pushed his head back further, until the angle of his head pressed his neck firmly against the top of the bar. Then after a long second, he released his hands from the bar and slowly moved them out to the side. No tricks, no safety net below, only the perfection of his pose held him on the bar.

The audience gasped and then thundered approval.

Dick took a moment to just enjoy this, an audience responding to his every move. Then he popped his head forward, grabbed the bar and flipped upside-down. After holding it a few seconds, he hooked one knee over the bar and released his hands, waving to the crowd below.

The crowd loved it, but Lisi looked freaked out. "You are so crazy," she yelled to him as the bar began to move lower, signifying the end of their act.

"Now, now, now," the announcer began, one with a British voice this time, "let's not be so careless, little Dormouse." The music and the applause petered out as the voice continued. "We do want you to be in one piece, don't we?"

"Dick," Lisi said in a hushed voice, as though they might be overheard thirty feet in the air.

Dick quickly flipped himself up and climbed onto the bar with Lisi.

"What's going on," she asked fearfully. "Who are those people?"

There were guards from the theater gathered below them, all of them sporting a hat of an outrageous nature-some hard hats, some deerstalkers, some top hats and a wide variety of fedoras. The way they moved was robotic, unnatural.

"Now," the British voice continued, "bring me my Alice."

As the men began bouncing on the large trampoline directly below them, Dick's mind was hurriedly putting the pieces together. _Hats, British voice, Dormouse, Alice_ -those could only mean one person: Jervis Tetch.

"It's the Mad Hatter," Dick whispered. At light speed, his mind clicked through what he knew about the villain-all of it alarming. The Mad Hatter was Jervis Tetch, a brilliant scientist who studied mind control and worked with several baddies before his last incarceration in Arkham Asylum. He was foiled by Batman several times, but always alone, never with Robin. There was something about the man that made Batman go into overprotective mode.

"Who?" Lisi grabbed his hand.

"British...scientist turned villain, right? The Mad Hatter. Isn't that him?" Dick asked as if unsure of himself.

"Why did he call me Alice?"

"I don't know." Dick bit his bottom lip as the guards jumping nearly reached the trapeze. This was not a question he wanted to answer. Tetch was a rumored child molester, something Batman had never confirmed but Robin suspected to be true, given the man's preference for young blond girls whom he called "Alice" after the titular character in _Alice in Wonderland._

This was bad. Dick was in civilian gear in a theater full of kids, movie stars-all potential hostages-versus squads of what looked like mind-controlled security guards. And all of this was being captured on live television, which meant that he was going to have to get all these audience members out of here, save Lisi, outsmart Tetch and do it all as Dick Grayson.

 _Damn. Better stay traught._

Dick wound one leg through the rope holding the trapeze and got a better grip on Lisi's hand. The guards were bouncing higher and higher now and finally, one managed to grab hold of the bar. The ropes shook and pulled taut.

"You're going to break the rope!" Dick shouted helplessly, all the while knowing that they didn't care, probably _couldn't_ care.

"Stop it!" Lisi yelled as she fought to stop the guard from grabbing her ankle.

Dick squatted and punched the man's hand away, but froze as the man swung wide and nearly lost his grip. Tetch was controlling this man; Dick had no protect his life as well as Lisi's.

Another guard made the leap up and took hold of the trapeze. Now there were two grasping at Lisi's ankles one-handed. _Mindless idiots._

"You're going to kill her," Dick yelled as he blocked their attempts. One hand collided too hard and the man lost his grip. Dick watched in horror as the man fell, silently, colliding with several other guards on their way up and five men were sent sprawling all over the stage.

The audience was screaming, and Tetch was trying to calm them. "This will all be over soon, duckies, as soon as I get my Alice."

The trapeze swung perilously with the one guard still hanging on. The others were still bouncing, completely ignoring the plight of the fallen. Dick looked up for a way out.

"Can you climb all the way up?" he called to Lisi.

She clung to one side of the rope and shook, her tears dripping on Dick below her. Despite that, her voice was steady as she answered, "No, but I still have my harness on."

"There's probably no one holding it," Dick called up. "We can't count on that."

Another guard bounced up and caught onto the trapeze and then another. All of the guards hanging reached up to grab at Lisi's ankles again and Dick punched their hands away.

"No! No! You fools! You'll kill her!" Tetch had finally caught on to what his minions were up to.

But it was too late.

 _ **SNAP!**_

The rope on one side of the trapeze broke.

* * *

Wally was moving before he was even thinking, putting on his uniform, grabbing his emergency backpack and zipping out through the zeta tube while the Conner's questions were still hanging in the air.

The Mad Hatter was at the awards show and Lisi was in danger. Worse, Dick was in danger _in civilian mode._ Wally was so stinkin' tired of that happening!

There was a zeta tube security override that Dick had programmed in for an emergency, one that would get Wally to Wayne Manor and to the Batcave despite their hyperactive security. Wally pulled out his Wayne tech emergency watch, part of exactly twelve of Robin's contingency plans, given only after Wally promised forty-three thousand times never to use it to prank Batman, even though it was _seriously_ tempting.

Wally activated the beacon, let the watch scan his retina, and two seconds later, he was spilling out of the zeta tube directly into the Batcave. He ignored the garage full of cool vehicles, the armory and the tray of some kind of finger foods that Alfred must have left for Bruce on the small table, all of which he would have investigated on a normal visit. Instead, Wally sped straight over to stand at Batman's back.

The Caped Crusader stood watching the live broadcast of the awards show, cowl down. The tenseness of his posture showed concern, and Wally allowed him the requisite five seconds the man usually needed to deal with a speedster's entrance before speaking.

He tried to keep it slow, he really did, but what came out was, "WhatarewegoingtodoBatman? Thoseguyshave gunsandRobisoutofuniformandmaybetheywant Dickdeadanyway andwehavetostopthem-"

Batman turned on him, cowl back in place. "Silence. Jervis Tetch, aka _The Mad Hatter,_ uses hats to mind-control his minions. Often, they are innocent civilians and cannot be held responsible for their actions. They are, in effect, human shields between us and the hostages, human shields that will attack us. To dismantle Tetch's technology, we must have a sample of one of those hats. Go and bring one to me. Once I have looked inside, I can create the right tool to block the signal, and the men can be dealt with one by one. Be careful in removing it. We have no idea what the damage might be. "

"ButwhataboutDick? He'sfallingoffthe-"

"Dick will never let himself fall," Batman's dark eyes bored into Wally's with a stern faith that left him breathless. "And Tetch will have his sights set on someone else tonight. Dick will be fine as long as we get what we need. Wally. Go now," Batman thundered, handing him the coordinates.

Wally obeyed.

* * *

Instantly, Dick's training kicked in. He jumped to grab the unbroken side rope and then reached down to grip Lisi's wrist.

For an eternal second, she was still falling and then everything snapped, their combined weight jerking at Dick's shoulder. The rope held...his grip held...and they swung as the guards fell voicelessly to the stage below.

It probably would have torn his shoulder muscle, if Robin wasn't in the habit of regularly saving people in Gotham by grappling them out of bad situations. As it was, with the adrenaline coursing through his veins tonight, he took her weight easily and gave thanks that his gloves helped keep his grip secure.

Of course, Lisi had _no_ idea he was Robin. " _Dick!",_ she screamed up at him, her beautiful face marred by pain and fear.

"I've got you," he said, gritting his teeth. "Just keep still." A hush had fallen over the crowd after the first screams faded.

With the motionless bodies of the fallen guards on the ground and Dick watching from above, the moment was far too close to that night-that horrible night when his parents had died and everything changed for Dick.

It took a vicious act of will power to keep his mind away from the circus and the bloodied bodies of his family in the sawdust and the hush of the faceless crowd...

"Buffoons!" Tetch chastised his men. "Lower the trapeze before my Alice _dies!"_

It seemed like a long time before the mechanism began to lower. As it did, Dick took a moment to look out at the crowd. It was harder to see; for some reason there were more lights shining on the stage than before. But it looked like the audience was still full and guards with hats were still posted at all the doors. No change. No Batman. But he would come.

"It's okay," Dick told Lisi, strength flowing from him down into her shaking arm, "I've still got you." Her eyes locked on his, panicked. They were lower, closer to the stage now, which was good, but some of the guards were reaching up for Lisi. She was kicking as some of the guards' hands reached her feet.

"Dick?" she asked as the guards encircled her.

"It's okay," Dick repeated, unable to say anything more comforting. There was nothing more he could do at the moment. _Batman, where are you?_

Applause tentatively rang out from the audience as the guards' brought Lisi down, and it was obvious that Tetch's constant instructions for them to be gentle were working.

Dick had no assurance that the guards would be as kind as they surrounded him, staring down with blank faces. There was no escape without going through them. Dick's nerves ratcheted up tighter with every second of inaction that ticked by. Instinctively, he began breathing deeper, trying to calm himself and wait for whatever was going to happen. There was nothing else he could do.

But when a hand grabbed his shoulder, instinct took over.

Dick jerked around and lashed out, sending a fist into the abdomen of the big man at his back-Gunther. There was a long moment when they stared at each other and Dick began to feel that he had just made a very terrible mistake.

Then, there were hands grabbing Dick from all directions. He was held tight as Gunther hit him with what felt like a fist made of cement. After only a few hits, Dick slumped like a drunk on New Year's Eve but the hits kept coming. Every single one took his breath away and time lost all meaning.

"Oh, for heaven's sake, _release the Dormouse!"_

The loud order seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere and made no sense to Dick's fuzzy mind at all. His face felt numb and he really, really _hated_ having all those hands still holding him. They wouldn't let _go._ This time, they pressed him down to the ground and onto his stomach no matter how hard he kicked.

He hated it. He was defenseless like this-no kevlar, no uniform or personal defense system. _Stupid costume._ They forced his hands behind his back which pulled horribly at Dick's right shoulder, already tight from the strain put on it from catching Lisi.

"Dick! No- _stop it!"_

Hearing Lisi panic made Dick start to fight again, but there was a quick end to that when a knee landed on his back. Had he any breath, he would have yelled as the weight drove into his spine and his ribs creaked ominously. The smell of dust and blood invaded his nostrils and his heartbeat grew loud in his ears.

Dick tried to meditate past the pain and the suffocation and the feel of those hands on him. The noise in his head reached a crescendo and then suddenly-

Time skipped. The weight on his back was gone and he was gasping for air as someone pulled him to his feet. He must have passed out.

Dick couldn't move his arms; they'd been tied behind his back, but he could breathe through the pain and try to blink away the fog that had settled in his brain.

Quickly he took stock. It was difficult to see through his left eye; it was stinging and sticky with what was probably blood. His nose and mouth were bleeding and a tooth felt loose. Not to mention his ribs felt wrong and his arms scraped and bruised.

"There was no need to be so rough with him," a heavily-accented voice scolded-German, maybe. Dick wanted to resist as a tall, heavy-set man grasped at the back of Dick's neck and pulled him in. Something about this man's touch made his skin crawl. But then again, it had to be better than being at the bottom of a dog pile. Right?

"He's so very little," the man continued, "I can just pick him up like this." And with that, Dick was shocked to feel himself lifted and tucked against the man's side like a sack of potatoes. It hurt, but he was glad to be pulled away from that circle of brainless, blank-faced men.

As he was carried toward the front of the stage, an incredible sight met his eyes. A large table was there, fully decorated with the usual Mad Tea Party implements-cups, plates, a tea pot and enough food to choke an elephant. How had they brought all of this in? Had Dick been out _that_ long?

"There you go, little one," The large man carrying him dropped him in a hard, wooden chair and scooted the chair up to the table.

At the head of the table sat Jervis Tetch, the Mad Hatter, who was looking at Dick with something akin to horror. "I thought I said don't harm them, you imbeciles. This is a tea party, not a blood bath! As you can see, our Alice is _unbloodied_ and cooperating very nicely."

"Go to hell," a quavering reply came from Dick's left. Dick jerked at that and turned his head. His vision on that side was so impaired that he hadn't even noticed Lisi sitting at the other end of the table, fury in her eyes even as they streamed with tears.

"You shouldn't say things like that. Especially once the March Hare arrives," the large German man said to Lisi, his hand resting on the back of Dick's head. "Your little friend's life will depend on it."

"Okay, okay! Please don't hurt him. But I thought...I thought _you_ were the March Hare," Lisi said in a faint voice.

From the other end of the table, the Mad Hatter giggled. "The March Hare? Him? No, no, dear girl. The German is the Walrus. It's easy to tell because he loves to eat oysters! Get it?" As the Hatter laughed, all the expressionless guards joined in as if ordered to do so.

Lisi looked confused, but Dick caught the reference to the story told by the Walrus and the Carpenter in _Alice in Wonderland_. The Walrus was an insidiously ludicrous character who charmed oysters to their doom and then ate them.

The Hatter was still laughing when a louder, more sinister laugh echoed throughout the theater, causing a loud reaction with many fearful cries. Dick jerked in his seat, eyes wide as the Walrus rested a large, clammy hand on Dick's neck. He whispered, "Now _that's_ the March Hare, dumpling."

Dick was horrified. That laugh featured in his worst nightmares...it couldn't be.

But then who _else_ could play the part of someone as mad as a March Hare?


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Wally arrived back at the Batcave in a little under nine minutes, sailor hat in his hands. He was breathless, angry and more than a little disturbed by what he had seen. Leaving Lisi and Dick behind to the mercy of those men had not set right with him at all.

"Here'sthehat, Batman," Wally said as he sped over, expecting questions or a glare or some sort of response. Instead, Batman had become a statue, his eyes glued to the screen in front of him.

At first, Wally only saw the chaos and horror of the scene he had just left, but then he saw the newest addition to the mad, mad tea party and icy tendrils of fear spread quickly through his body.

"No," he whispered.

Fear for Dick hit him like punch in the gut.

Batman turned and ripped the hat out of Wally's hands, glaring. "Miss M is going to meet you on the roof. She knows what to do. You are to wait until you hear from me. No matter what happens."

"But what-there's-"

"Wait. Until. You. Hear. From. Me!"

Wally nodded.

"Go."

Wally went, but not until after he saw Batman feverishly tearing into the hat, trying to isolate the control mechanism that held sway over so many men tonight. Bruce was going to do everything possible to save Dick. Wally would just have to trust him on that and do the same thing.

* * *

"Oh, jolly good!," the Mad Hatter called out, standing at his place at the head of the table. "At last, the March Hare is here!"

The Joker appeared at the side of the stage with a flourish, clown white face stretched into an lunatic's grin, eyes laughing with malice. In one hand, he carried a wooden cane. "Hello boys and girls! So sorry to be late, but I had some one to kill-ha HA-I mean, some _time_ to kill."

"Oh, hurry, hurry," the Hatter said, grinning as he waved him over. "We have everyone in place and the cameras are rollllllling."

Dick's gaze zeroed in on the camera closest to the table. The red light was still on, indicating that it was recording, and the man behind the camera had a racing helmet on-a sure sign that he was being mind-controlled into continuing. If that wasn't enough, on the wall beside the stage was a lit red sign reading ON THE AIR.

Which meant that all of this was being watched...by the world, yes, but also by Bruce and surely Wally, which meant that help should be here any second...maybe should have already _been_ here.

But if Dick had to hazard a guess, he would say that it was Tetch's mind-control device that was slowing down a rescue attempt. Always difficult to try to take down mind-controlled minions without harming the civilians who are being controlled. First, they would have to figure out how the Hatter was controlling the-

"You've met the March Hare before haven't you," the Walrus said, breathing heavily in Dick's ear. "I've heard him say that the two of you have a ' _special relationship.'_ I'd love to know what that means," he added, and Dick leaned away with a small shudder.

Oh yes, he had suffered through one memorable meeting with the Joker, but none that were nearly as bad as the ones he'd had as Robin. The Joker found Dick _interesting_ , mostly because of his connection with Bruce Wayne and the man's standing in polite society, but the clown's true obsession was Robin.

Bruce had tried to explain it to Dick a few times, how the Joker was an attention-seeking hound who always wanted Batman's full attention. The demented criminal could only "earn" it by devising increasingly complicated scenarios that grew bloodier and more horrific as time went on.

And then one day, Robin had appeared at Batman's side, a young boy who often had Batman's full, undivided attention just by being himself and by being _good_ , while Joker could only get it by acting his very worst. There was something twisted in the Joker that felt compelled to destroy that goodness and to punish Robin for taking Batman's focus away from their destructive, endless game of good-versus-evil, Batman vs. the Joker.

Honestly, Dick couldn't understand it, but he had experienced it firsthand. Seeing the deranged clown so close had him struggling to remember that he was _not_ Robin right now. Every instinct in his body was screaming at him to fight or run, but as Dick Grayson, there was no avenue of escape at the moment. Even Robin would have found it a challenge.

"Look-a captive audience," the Joker sang out, "my favorite kind. Oh! I almost forgot!" He pulled out large white rabbit ears on a headband marred by splashes of blood across the front. "How do they look? Oh, don't worry," the Joker said, indicating the blood stains, "those aren't mine." After a long pause, he frowned at the sea of faces. "You're so serious. Laugh! This is a tea party."

"Yes, a tea party-not a blood bath," said the Mad Hatter in a sweet voice. "I keep telling them that. But they won't listen. Look what they did to my Dormouse," he pointed to Dick. "Poor thing can barely sit up straight."

The Joker looked intently at Dick, his smile stretching with malice. "Oooooo, looky who we have here: Little Dickie Grayson. Would you like to play a game?"

Dick kept his mouth shut, not because he thought it was smart, but because he suddenly had a huge lump in his throat. It was hard to breathe past it, let alone speak.

"No, no, no. This is _not_ a game. It's a tea party," the Mad Hatter insisted, "and we've been waiting for you for ages!"

"Yes, yes, I know. First the party, then the fun," the Joker said, winking in Dick's direction. "Where's my seat?"

"Up here, of course, near me," the Mad Hatter said, directing him to the chair across and down two seats from Dick. "And I'll be here and Alice is there and then the Dormouse, of course. It's all perfect! Everyone begin!"

"That means you go to sleep, little Dormouse," the Walrus gently pushed at Dick's head until the boy put his forehead down on the table, which was far from comfortable. But he took in a few deeper breaths and tried to focus past the discomforts of his body. For the next few minutes, the conversation flowed around him, waxing and waning. They must have been reading from the teleprompter, or else how would Lisi know her "Alice" lines? The poor girl sounded terrified.

Once, Dick got distracted and glanced up only to get a smack on the head that bumped his forehead back onto the table, painfully.

"Okay, okay," he grumbled and turned his head so that his cheek rested on the wood. The ropes around his wrists were proving to be difficult to untie and the only three plans for escape he had devised depended entirely on someone showing up to help him. It was hard not to be furious with himself for getting into this situation. This was officially the worst first date in history.

Minutes later, Dick was finally making some progress with the ropes on his wrists when the Walrus leaned in and breathed on the side of Dick's neck again.

" _That's your cue,"_ the Walrus whispered.

Dick picked up his head and squinted at the teleprompter in the ensuing silence. It was hard to read with one eye so swollen and blurry, in fact...he really _couldn't_ read it.

He knew what the Dormouse said at some point, so he muttered sleepily, " _...treacle, treacle, treacle?"_

'"No, no, _no!"_ The Mad Hatter shouted, standing and flinging a cup at the table near Dick's head, where it promptly shattered. "That doesn't come until later!"

"Aw, Hatty, don't be so mean," the Joker intervened, "he probably has stage fright. Let me go have a word with him, give him some encouragement."

"He's trying his best!" Lisi insisted. "Leave him alone!"

The Joker turned to Lisi. "Don't you worry, Nervous Nelly. I won't hurt him. Well..." he giggled, "not too much."

Dick broke out in a cold sweat. He'd finally managed to get two knots undone around his wrists but he was far from free.

"Now, now, little mouse," the Joker said, turning toward Dick.

The Walrus, shockingly enough, stood up to face the Joker. "I think he is only having trouble trying to sss-"

There was a choking sound from over Dick's head and he jerked his head up to see the Walrus clutching his throat where a fork was embedded. Blood drained out from the small holes where the tines had buried themselves. The Joker had thrown it nearly too fast to see. Dick didn't think it was deadly, but the Walrus was in agony. He tried to speak several times, but the Joker simply ignored him.

"Dickie, Dickie, Dickie...what _do_ they teach young people in schools these days? If I put the same lackluster performance into my villainous activities as you put into this role, I would be out of the clubhouse in no time!" The clown was leaning across the table from Dick now, elbows on the table, his chin in hand. "Now. How can I help you? What do you _need_ to perform better? Has being obscenely rich stifled your imagination? Poor lad. Or is it simply motivation that you lack? Are the cameras just not _doing_ it for you?"

Dick licked his lips nervously, knowing there was no good way to answer. The truth was, the Joker liked to hear himself talk, and any response could provoke one of his rages. Silence was wise.

"I think that's what it is," the Joker continued, smiling in a way that left his eyes blank, "lack of motivation. So sad. But Uncle J can help you find your motivation! For example, here's a good one I know: how about fear, little Mouse? How good is fear at motivating you?"

Lisi gave a stifled sob from her seat and Dick suddenly found his voice. "About as good as human decency is in motivating you."

The Joker leaned back and hooted in laughter. "Well spoken, and probably very, _very_ true." He stared down at Dick until the laughter had completely left his eyes. "But not something I want to hear from the Dormouse." He flung out his arms and knocked plates to the floor, then climbed up on the table. With graceless energy, he made his way over to Dick's side of the table, crawling over china and food alike as he went.

The Mad Hatter was sputtering in protest. "But-but-the nibbles..."

The Joker kept coming until his hands were on the arms of Dick's chair, leaning forward aggressively until Dick was pressed into the back of his chair. The villain's breath smelled like sauerkraut. "Dormouses should stay _silent_ until their cue and then...they should SPEAK the right LINES!" he screamed at Dick.

The words echoed around the suddenly-silent building and Dick felt his eyes blazing with a ferocity he could not contain. If he only had his hands free...

"Hmmm." The Joker cocked his head at Dick. "Obviously..." he said, pulling back a few inches, "you don't _feel_ enough like a Dormouse. That's your problem. But you're in luck. I know how to help with that, too!"

The clown swung up into a seated position, his feet on the seat of Dick's chair, his eyes alight with a manic gleam. A wicked-looking blade was suddenly in one hand and his other hand snapped forward to grasp hold of Dick's throat. Dick choked as he was pulled forward helplessly, hands still bound behind his back, until he was nearly resting in-between the Joker's legs.

"Comfy?" the Joker asked, pressing the knife into Dick's cheek. "Now, let's ask the boys and girls at home watching a question. In the name of all that's unholy, how _is_ one supposed to be a Dormouse when one doesn't have any whiskers? I know, I _know._ I agree. Let's just fix that."

With a swift jerk, the Joker's blade sliced into Dick's skin, leaving behind cold numbness and a warm flow of blood. "Perfect. One red whisker. Are you feeling it now, boy? Need another? Maybe right here?" Another slice on the same side, deeper this time.

"No!" yelled the Mad Hatter as the Joker pressed the knife against Dick's skin again. "This. Is. A. _Tea. Party! Not a BLOOD BATH!"_

The Joker released the boy, who jerked away from the psycho, breathing heavily.

"Oops. Forgot," the Joker called over to the Hatter. "The little tyke has probably learned his lesson, anyway." He licked a bit of blood off his hand before clambering back over the table. "I'll just pick these up." He grabbed a few broken plates and set them haphazardly around the table. "Good as new!"

Dick was leaning back against his chair, trying to breathe calmly while the ache in his cheek deepened. The Walrus was fussing over him, wiping away the blood, a napkin dotted with red wrapped around his throat where the Joker had gotten him as well. As always, Dick felt off-balance and nauseated after dealing with the Joker. Small tremors ran down his body, but he couldn't tell if it was anger or fear or pain or some horrible mix of all three. All he knew was that the Walrus was making it _worse_.

"It's no matter," crooned the pudgy man. He had, at some point, begun rubbing circles on Dick's back and whispering nonsensical words of comfort.

Across the table, The Joker was placating the Hatter, promising to be more humane and absolutely blood-bath-free from here on out. Lisi was still crying.

Dick jerked. The Walrus's hand was moving lower and lower on his back, his hot breath now coating Dick's neck again as the boy turned away in revulsion.

"Get off me," he said venomously.

"You don't mean that," the Walrus replied, "after all, you wouldn't want me to bring the March Hare back down here, would you?"

A suffocating rage swept over Dick. He had taken as much as he could stand and once again, instinct took over.

With a violent thrust Dick drove his head into the Walrus's face, a satisfying crunch being the reward. The Walrus howled, but more importantly, he stopped running his hands all over Dick.

"What happened?" The Hatter vaulted to his feet and pushed aside the Joker, looking over the scene aghast. The Walrus was blubbering and holding his streaming nose as Dick watched, restrained, bloodied and half-wild. "NO! _No more blood!"_ the Mad Hatter screeched. "You! You Dormouse! The Dormouse doesn't talk back! The Dormouse doesn't bleed! And more importantly, the Dormouse doesn't break people's noses!" The Joker giggled and followed behind the Hatter as the man strode down the table, continuing his tirade. "You are the _worst_ Dormouse I've ever seen! In fact..."

There was a surreal moment, a long pause while the Hatter took several huffing breaths and seemed to be considering several punishments.

"He is my Dormouse no longer," he said finally. "You may have him, Walrus." And with that pronouncement, the Hatter stalked back to his chair, muttering to himself. A few steps behind him, the Joker cackled, throwing his head back to laugh at Dick's predicament...not a good sign.

"The audience won't like it. Ratings will go down," the Joker warned the Hatter.

"I don't care," the Hatter said petulantly, "he's gone too far."

Dick wasn't sure exactly what the Walrus wanted with him, but he sure as hell wasn't planning to stick around and find out. As the Joker continued to try and placate the Hatter, Dick finally managed to get the last knot around his wrists untied.

 _Yes!_

With no warning, he leapt on top of the table and dove to an ungainly roll on the other side in a burst of speed that left everyone flat-footed. Not a shot fired. No response at all as Dick grabbed a butter knife and slid to his knees beside Lisi, trying to ignore the pain radiating from all over his body.

"I'm so sorry, Dick. I'm so sorry..." Lisi chanted, tears streaming down her cheeks as the room came alive around them. Dick couldn't meet her eyes, not yet.

"Look! The little Dormouse is trying to play hero," the Joker pointed out.

A few cheers came from the audience, finally breaking their silence.

"Joker, your 'motivation' session didn't work! The Dormouse shouldn't be trying to escape. Someone _get him!"_ The Mad Hatter yelled, and from all around them footsteps approached. Dick looked up to see ten men moving quickly toward them-not nearly as many as Dick would have expected.

"Hurry, please, " Lisi begged.

Dick was nearly done sawing away at Lisi's bonds when there was a rolling series of loud thuds from behind them. Everyone turned and stared. All of the guards had tripped and fallen over each other.

"Oh for heaven's sake," the Hatter grumbled, "you're all useless!"

Dick swallowed a grin and kept working on the rope. He'd bet his life that a certain speedster was responsible for that. Things were definitely looking up.

"Don't worry, Hatty. I'll cut this attempt short," the Joker concluded, brandishing a steak knife.

"Don't hit my Alice!" the Hatter cried.

"Now why would I do that?"

Dick caught a movement out of the corner of his eye and ducked as a knife thunked into the chair beside his head.

"Quick mouse," the Joker said as he hurled another utensil. This time, Dick took a heavy serving spoon to the shoulder as he jumped in front of Lisi.

The Joker burst out laughing. "Noble mouse!"

Dick pulled Lisi from her chair and started running.

"Get up off the floor, you imbeciles! You have weapons!" The Hatter screamed. "Shoot him!"

But most of the guards were still trying to untie the shoelaces which had somehow gotten tied together. The rest of them were looking around for their missing guns, perplexed, with that same eerie silence.

"Speaking of which," said the Joker, "look at what I found in my pocket!"

Though Dick and Lisi had been almost to the end of the stage, they froze at the unmistakeable sound of a shotgun being cocked behind them. They looked back to see Joker standing there, shotgun aimed at them, grinning like a tiger eyeing a dying gazelle.

"I wouldn't move if I were you," the Joker confided in them, his bunny ears twitching as he shook his head. "Because a shotgun like this can blow your innards into outtards! And I'm pretty sure that even if I did miss, they wouldn't," he pointed past them.

Dick whirled around and saw with a sinking heart that there were five more guards there, all hatted and all with guns pointed at Lisi and him. He shoved her behind him, gaze shooting from the Joker to the guards and back again. In his mind, the trajectories of the different guns were being calculated, each possible move on his part considered and rejected. There were too many guns too far away.

"Not my Alice," the Hatter pointed out nervously, "aim for the Dormouse, you wankers-the DORMOUSE!"

Dick wanted to dodge, but couldn't for fear of leaving Lisi open. In a matter of seconds, all of his options had been taken away. All he could do was pray that Wally or someone else had something figured out.

And then... _Lisi_ stepped in front of _him_.

"Wait," he said, confused, trying to pull her back behind him.

"No," she hissed at him, "they'll kill you but they won't dare shoot me!"

It was working. The guards, confused, lowered their guns. The Joker was gaping at her, his eyes popping out of his head until a grin took over his face. Soon, he was laughing so hard that he dropped the shotgun. "Hatter, you've been had! She is no Alice."

"Of course I'm not!" Lisi said between gritted teeth as she put a hand behind her and began pushing Dick backwards. "Dick? Get us out of here."

Dick obeyed, but first, he slid one hand around Lisi's midsection to keep her close in case he needed to throw them both to the ground. She would _not_ be taking a bullet for him.

The Joker continued to laugh; the Hatter continued to glower; and the guards raised and lowered their guns continuously, confused. Dick moved with Lisi slowly back to the edge of the stage and onto the stairs heading into the silent audience.

It wasn't until Dick was several feet up the aisle that he realized the audience had disappeared.

"What just happened?" Lisi whispered.

"Keep going," Dick said in return, feeling that an illusion must have been projected in the theater at some point, which meant Miss M was here. That would have been the only way to keep the Hatter happy while emptying the audience of hostages. Unfortunately, Dick and Lisi had just broken the illusion.

The Hatter gasped.

"Hmmm...someone's screwing around with reality," the Joker said from the edge of the stage, looking around the theater. "Batsy? Are you here?"

A yellow and red blur began swirling around the five guards, taking their guns and quickly knocking the men out one by one. Kid Flash was awesome tonight, visible only as he slowed during the fight.

"Don't tell me they sent a kid to do a Bat's job?" Joker drawled. "Are all the Justice brats here? Robbie? Are you holding back because of my toy? Aw, you know I won't hurt them if you'll just come out and play. You'd make a nice addition to the tea party table, tied down and spread o-"

Then the Joker's voice was cut off by a black-gloved hand wrapped around his neck.

Dick smiled and straightened.

"It's Batman," Lisi breathed reverently.

The clown was still trying to talk, but the Dark Knight wasn't letting him finish his sentence. Instead, the vigilante had disarmed the villain and was whispering something threatening. The Joker was mesmerized.

The door at the rear of the stage burst open and uniformed, unhatted police officers came rushing in.

"No," wailed the Hatter, "we didn't get to finish the tea party! It was all that damn Dormouse's fault!"

"You're under arrest, Tetch." Two officers grabbed him and cuffed his hands behind his back.

Batman finally released the Joker and walked away, sweeping his cape behind him. Six officers approached the Joker with drawn weapons.

"Why so nervous?" the Joker asked them, his voice a little hoarse after being choked. "It's not as though I'm strapped with explosives or anything. Or...wait a minute...maybe I am..." He tugged at his jacket idly.

The officers reacted in an instant, four kneeling, guns drawn and aimed while two darted in and pulled the Joker's hands away from his jacket.

Batman whirled around. "Joker," he growled.

"Possible code ten," one officer said into his communicator.

"Oh, that's right," the Joker smirked. "I left that bomb in my _other_ jacket. Too bad. Maybe next time, Batsy." The policemen quickly trussed him up, ignoring his demented laugh.

Dick finally relaxed and let go of Lisi. The stage lights dimmed and the ON THE AIR light blinked off.

"Is it over?" Lisi asked.

Dick caught a blur of light above him and wished he could thank Miss M. But she would have to remain hidden. "Yeah, it's over."

Lisi turned and fell against him, trembling and huffing out suddenly panicky breaths. "And we're okay. Right? I mean, you're okay, right? I think I'm okay," she asked, clutching his arm.

"I'm fine," he insisted, "but you might be going into shock. You should sit down," he said, guiding her to an empty seat at a nearby table. A swish of wind went by, leaving two water glasses on the table. With a suppressed grin, Dick offered one to Lisi, hoping she didn't notice how much his hand was trembling.

"Thanks," he whispered to the wind.

"But you're the one who got hurt. And you're okay?" She looked at him, her eyes traveling from his swollen eye to his dripping cheek. Thank goodness the blood flow had nearly stopped now.

"I'm fine. Just relax. The hard part is over."

A moment later, Batman launched himself off the stage and landed with a swirl of cape only feet away. "Are you two all right?"

Lisi looked up at him in awe and nodded. "Yes, thanks to you. You saved our lives!"

Dick saw the muscle in Bruce's cheek clench. "I had help. And I think you did an admirable job of saving yourselves. We only came in at the end." He put a heavy hand on Dick's shoulder. "Good work. You're a brave young man."

Dick was nearly speechless, but finally managed a muttered, "Thanks."

"And you, young lady. Well done."

"I didn't do much. I mostly c-cried and fell apart. Dick was the brave one."

Dick was about to protest, but Batman's slight shift in posture cut him off.

"In the end, it was you who shielded Dick. That was a very brave thing you did, and it most likely saved his life."

Dick looked over and met her stunned glance. He nodded and whispered, "Thank you."

She smiled, dimpling even through sudden tears. "Well, you saved me first."

The corners of Batman's mouth curved up a fraction.

"Did they catch them all, Batman? The Walrus, too?" Dick asked, his voice suddenly a little shaky.

Batman met his eyes with a look of granite. "Yes. I believe that particular criminal was injured trying to escape. Something was said about both legs being broken." Dick heard the deep satisfaction in Batman's voice and felt something in him relax. Batman put his hand on Dick's shoulder.

"I heard the same thing," said a familiar voice behind them.

Dick turned to see Wally standing there in uniform. "Kid Flash. Wow. Did you help Batman save us tonight?"

Wally sauntered over. "I believe I did. Got the hats off so the civilians could be dealt with and helped evacuate the audience. Then I tied the guards' shoes together and stole all their guns. Well, eventually. I may have missed a few at first."

"You're Kid Flash!" Lisi said, wonder in her tone. "You're amazing!"

"No, not really. I'm just glad I could help."

Dick snorted at the look of false humility on Wally's face.

Lisi stood. "I've always wanted to meet a superhero and now I've met two!"

"That's cool. Because...I've always wanted to meet you," Wally confessed.

Batman shot a look at Dick, who tried and failed to grin widely. _Ouch._

The speedster put Lisi's hand in the crook of his arm. "Let's get you over to the med team to get checked out. You were a hostage for a long time."

"Dick, too?"

"Oh he'll be along in a minute. He's fine."

Dick shook his head.

"Just a second," Lisi said and then quickly bent over to give Dick a kiss on his uninjured cheek. "Goodbye, Dick, and thank you."

Dick flushed from head to toe. Why was kissing so disorienting? Lisi took Wally's arm and headed up the aisle.

"Need a moment?" Batman asked Dick, sounding amused.

Dick nodded and tried to gather himself. As the giddiness of her kiss faded, exhaustion from the night crept in. Dick really didn't feel well. His whole body was throbbing.

"Nothing broken?" Dick shook his head. "Well, you need to get that looked after," Batman said, indicating Dick's cheek. "Could be a nasty scar if not treated properly."

Dick nodded and stood up, muscles protesting vigorously. "Can we just agree that this was the worst first date ever?"

Batman's lips twitched. "Agreed. But obviously, you did make a good first impression." They strode up the aisle, Batman letting Dick set the pace.

"So it was all broadcast, the whole thing?" Dick asked.

"Afraid so."

Dick sighed. "I am never going to hear the end of this at school."

With a whoosh, Kid Flash appeared at Dick's other side. "Dude, you okay?"

"I thought you were checking on Lisi," Dick teased.

"I was, but her bodyguard is back and she's fine. I'm pretty sure you got the worse end of it, anyway. Really. You all right?" Wally sounded really concerned.

Dick nodded, tired of asserting how fine he was when he really didn't feel it. "I just want to go home."

"Not yet," Batman said before giving Wally a look. "You'll walk him the rest of the way. I need to make a change."

"Sure. I got him." Wally noticed Dick lagging, and took his arm. "Dude. Stop being ridiculous and let me help." He pulled Dick's arm over his shoulders and took some of his weight. It hurt Dick's ribcage, but it felt better, too. Dick was so, so tired.

After a long moment of trudging up the aisle, Wally broke the silence in a low voice. "I hate seeing you in situations like this where you can't fight back. I _really_ hate it. And it was kinda my fault you were in there, you know?"

"KF," Dick said, smiling, "so not your fault. I'm actually glad I was there, to help Lisi. It could have been really bad for her."

"Yeah. Looked like she was glad too," Wally added, sounding slightly jealous. "But you did good. You kicked ass even without the suit."

Dick nodded, fatigue pulling at him. "Thanks."

"And I think you should keep the leotard. Fan club was going nuts online."

"Shut up."

"They just thought you needed more sequins."

Dick groaned.

By the time they got to the ambulance, Dick was heartily wishing that he could just be Robin and jet home for Alfred to patch him up. But no, he had to play helpless and be treated as a civilian. The only good news was that the media was kept far away and Lisi was already on her way home so she didn't see any of it.

Dick laid back on the gurney and tried not to wince as they cleaned his cheek to look at the cuts. It was going to need stitches, of course. Then, embarrassingly enough, they cut away the top part of his costume to check his ribs and for possible internal bleeding. Dick could have told them his ribs weren't broken, just painful, but he was still playing stupid civilian.

Thank goodness, Bruce showed up then, frantic in his stupid-but-caring parent mode. "Dick! Thank god you're okay!" It was usually wince-worthy to see Bruce playing dumb, but this time Dick felt better when the man took his hand and dramatically refused to be separated from him.

Once they were on the way in the ambulance, Bruce leaned forward and smoothed Dick's hair. "Just relax. It'll be over soon."

This really was the worst time; Bruce knew that. There was nothing to do but lay on the stretcher, forced to admit your injuries and face the pain with nothing to distract you. It was hell. His cheek was really throbbing now and Dick winced when a big bump jostled him. That knee to his back had left deep, deep bruising.

"Dick?"

Dick's eyes flew open to see the female paramedic who had been working on him earlier. She was leaning over him, smiling softly. "You were a hero tonight, a real hero. We'll take good care of you, promise."

Dick tried to smile with his eyes, since it hurt to smile the regular way.

The paramedic patted his arm and then went back to sit on her seat at the front. Bruce was watching. When those calm, stern eyes met his, Dick decided it didn't matter if his fan club went nuclear and everyone at school made fun of his new scar. Lisi Ericksson had given him a kiss of gratitude; the Joker and the Mad Hatter had been shut down; and there was pride in Bruce's eyes.

What more could Dick possibly ask for?


End file.
